Well...Well...Well

Seriously...Where Is Sepp Kuss?

 

Has anyone else thought it a bit weird that the Durango Kid has practically disappeared from the peloton? It's almost as if everyone is keeping some secret. He's not talked about at all, good or bad. What's the deal?

I think he's been on house arrest serving a minor doping ban. As a condition of his suspension he has to sit out all the big races for six months but will be allowed to appear in smaller races once a month as long as he sucks.

In case no one has noticed, UAE/RockTheCasbah has been dominating the Giro d'Italia. Four dudes in the top eight on GC. All these cats are going to the Tour with Pogacar... and they are formidable.

Visma p/b Rabobank Scooter Rentals needs to get their act together if Jonas Vingegaard is going to win the TDF this year. Kuss better be doing some Rocky 4 type training in secret or he'll be dead weight in July.

The Woutdemption...That's My Boy!

 The whole cycling world can breathe a sigh of relief because, as it turns out, Wout van Aert is still a badass cyclist. The one man boy band pulled off a classy win at the Giro that required him to dig deep, burn matches, go to the pain cave, and any other cycling cliches that apply. As the old timey Belgians used to say after a win like this..."Good on ya, mate!"

Maybe I Was Too Hard On The Beaver...UCI World Rankings

1	Pogacar Tadej	UAE Team Emirates-XRG	3.185
2	van der Poel Mathieu	Alpecin-Deceuninck	2.725
3	Pedersen Mads	Lidl-Trek	2.597
4	Ganna Filippo	INEOS Grenadiers	1.722
5	van Aert Wout	Team Visma | Lease a Bike	1.638

If Not Wout, Then Who?

 

Mongo finds himself in an uncomfortable position. Not as bad as reverse cowgirl, but troubling none the less. Should I stay or should I go?

What does he have left? What kind of rider can he be? Has he lost his mental edge to mix it up in a field sprint? Should he get a cat? His mediocre results in both Cyclocross and his Spring campaign on the road have been underwhelming thus far.

If Mongo pulls a dick move and drops Wout as his "Guy" while he's coming back from injury due to a shitload of crashes, then where does that leave me? Who else is worthy of Mongo's juice? There's really no one who can break into the upper strata and consistently compete with the stars. 

I am pulling very hard for the strong group of American riders on the Pro Tour who have spread out some great results and will gladly drop "Top Ten Wout" if any of them rise to the top and make America great again. BTW...Where the f%*k  is Sepp Kuss?

These Guys Are Not F***ing Around!

 

Mongo wants to go on record, in case the Annunaki come back before July, and state that Jonas Vingegaard will have nobody to blame but himself if he doesn't win the 2025 Tour de France.

Team Visa-Bike Rental-Illuminati is loaded to the gills with the best Grand Tour support talent in the peloton. Multiple winners, up and coming studs, solid domestiques, Ron Jeremy...and of course, Wout van Aert. 

Everyone has their own strengths, but all of them can climb like a squirrel with a finger up its butt. It's almost as if they were hand picked in a money is no object approach by the team with the biggest budget.

MONGODAMUS is predicting... today... that Jonas Vingegaard will win the 2025 Tour de France.

Book it like a Viking Cruise!

Check Your Head

 

Mongo was sitting around the other day bemoaning my situation. What my situation was, was being snowbound for approximately thirty six hours in my home in an undisclosed southern state as an Arctic Polar, Nino, Vortex brought the icy tears of Winter. It turned out okay for Mongo because I prepared ahead of time and thankfully had enough milk, bread, eggs and plywood.

Anyway, after sitting around for a while and doing the rounds of my usual websites, I decided to move on from the porn and think about my blog... Why am I still doing this? What is my motivation? Is there any cohesive theme? Has it become boring? Do I Care? Does anyone care? Should I care that no one cares? What's with all the depressing and self-important shit? Has this blog just become my therapist?

My former life partner and best buddy, Snacks McGee, used to be all the therapy Mongo needed, but since he moved upstate after eighteen glorious years I have turned to my once lighthearted and witty blog into my personal ayahuasca trip of self reflection while balancing the perceptions of my external and internal worth. (54 word sentence, btw) That shit get's tired and old if not doled out in moderation. Both for the writer and the reader. So...here's the deal.

Mongo, from this day forward, will not purposefully post half-ass shit and keep the boo-hoo personal stuff to a minimum. Let's see where this trip takes us.

Let This Sink In

 

Melancholy Baby: Haiku

A crack in the door

Moments of regret seep through

A life left behind

The Wind And The Rain Billow Me

Three Hundred And Two Months Later

 

In The Night We'll Sit For A While

Shady's Back

                                                                                                                                                  (Getty Images)

 

Well...Here We Are

 As you all know, this is Mongo's sixty fifth year as a highfalutin, award adjacent, cycling connoisseur. I've played this game since the days of down-tube shifters, misogyny, and amphetamines.

 Where have you gone, Miguel Indurain?...The Keyser Soze of cycling.

 My final prediction of Pogacar as World Champion sealed a solid season for Mongo and I should have just walked away then and enjoyed more time with my lady on the trails...if you know what I mean. Instead, I'm closing out 2024 with an unnecessary post. 

 Also, I tripled my posts from last year and I honestly am feeling like the 2025 season will be a big opportunity for me to show the world that 2024 was no fluke. Whispers behind the scenes are hinting at a push for twenty. 

 Let's all move forward into 2025 with champagne wishes and caviar dreams and see what we can find.

The Finishing: Prediction Sure To Go Wrong

 First of all, let me say that I've always believed that an athlete should never lose their position due to injury. Therefore, Wout Van Asphalt will remain as Mongo's "Guy" going into the 2025 season.

You may be saying to yourself that with three wins in the Vuelta a Espana shouldn't his position be unquestioned? Well...no!

Let's keep it "a hunned"...There is better competition in an unsanctioned, Cat 4 alley cat scramble. The Vuelta is the Florida of Grand Tours. Has beens, wannabees, dopers, old guys, young guys, domestiques looking for their chance at glory...it has it all. If any Tour de France level winner shows up, no one else has a shot. Otherwise, it's like a Saturday night at Club Juana in Orlando...anything is possible.

WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS: PREDICTION

"TADEJ POGACAR"

W.W.R.G.D ?..."I'm A Worm Y'all"

A lifetime of lifetimes but a child once again

Beginning a journey with no destination

Wisdom from our youth is the foundation of forever

Walk with me and let me grow old in your eyes

The Oracle Of Delphi...Car Stereos

 

So... Mongo has been on Summer hiatus.

I know Van der Poel won E3 Saxo, Flanders, and Paris -Roubaix along with the Cyclocross World Championship. (The Road WC is still to come)

I know Tadej Pogacar won the Giro and Tour de France in dominating fashion.

All of these results were predicted by Mongodamus long before any of the injuries and races happened...February 1st, 2024... "Here

Also...

After much speculation amongst the masses about his status, considering the mediocre results of the year thus far, Mongo has decided to put Wout Van Aert on double secret probation and re-evaluate after the Vuelta on his "My Guy" position moving forward.

Jorgenson, Powless & Quinn

 

Golf And Alabama: Haiku

 Lost two friends this year

Both left imprints on my life

For Johnny and Mike

White Lightning: Triple: The Beginning: Haiku

 

Finding fulfillment

More than a four letter word

Inspirational