Saturday, March 31, 2012

Predictions Sure To Go Wrong

1...Stijn Devolder (I have a feeling)

2...Tom Boonen (Can't win everything)

3...Heinrich Haussler (He needs this one)

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The Happy Little Tree Returns The Favor

"A broad margin of leisure is as beautiful in a man's life as in a book. Haste makes waste, no less in life than in housekeeping. Keep the time, observe the hours of the universe, not of the cars."

(Henry David Thoreau) 

Monday, March 26, 2012



This year might be the most dramatic example of the power of Mongo's "Juice". With my endorsement of Omega Pharma-Quickstep at the beginning of the season, they have gone out and already won as many races as they did in the last two years...combined!

Tom Boonen is having a renaissance year. I just hope it's all legit. Mongo is always skeptical of older cyclists who, after consecutive down years, come back in top form. It's just kinda fishy...especially with the recent scientific revelations that state that there may be up to one hundred undetectable synthesized versions of EPO available to those willing to take the risk. We'll see?!

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The Lady In The Habit

I went down to the crossroads and stepped through an open door

I went down to the has been there before

I went down to the crossroads and got down on my knees

I went down to the crossroads...unspoken reasons to believe

Monday, March 19, 2012

I'm Not A Nutritionist But...

I'm pretty sure that eating an Alfredo Pasta Bread Bowl and a Stuffed Cheesy Bread from Domino's four hours prior to the 23/2300 Hammerfest was "not" a good idea. In fact...I know it wasn't!

Mongo has a bad habit of sabotaging myself with food. It is truly my Albatross..."real talk". Ice cream, pizza, pasta, chocolate...all contribute to my recurring failures. Today it was the pasta, bread, and cheese that turned my legs into sludge. No excuses...but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

It was a fast, fun ride. There was a strong turnout with all the usual suspects, including a rare appearance by "Shade-Tizzle". Unfortunately, MC-Lean was on a "vision quest" in the mountains where he was licking his wounds and was not there to raise the pace to an even more unmanageable level.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Predictions Sure To Go Wrong

Tomorrow, as you all know, is Mongo's birthday. A date which is also shared by such legends as pornstars, Katie Morgan and Stormy Daniels, as well as this eclectic group of fellow St. Patrick's Day babies. I would like to thank everyone in advance for the thousands of handwritten, embossed cards and the hundreds of expensive, custom-made gifts that I will undoubtedly be receiving throughout the day tomorrow. Oh...and there's also a bike race.

1...Edvald Boasson Hagen
2...Fabian Cancellara
3...Oscar Freire

Monday, March 12, 2012

What Will $420.00 Get You On Ebay?

"O.G." 1988 Vision "Gator" Mini deck.

Kate Upton Vs Colnago C59 Disc

Neither Rain Nor Sleet Nor Gloom Of Night: First MNR In The Books

Mongo has been looking forward to tonight for quite a while. With the time change comes the return of the the Smyrna Bicycles 23/2300 Hammerfest Monday Night Ride. Unfortunately, the weather decided to be a dick.

Six brave team members gathered at the appointed place and time under a steady drizzle. The rest of the crew, who have lost their "hardcore" street cred, decided that a little water was the deal breaker for the first official team ride of the season.

Mongo, Clay, Ian, Mark, Chris, and MC, all had a fun ride. The pace was quick but not crazy, with safety being a factor, and everyone rode well...with Mongo being the weakest link in this posse. But...I did climb pretty strong out there. Thanks to MC and some motivation, I managed to hang with the group most of the way on both big hills.

When it came to the Sprint, Mongo attacked MC early... which led to Mark jumping on the other side. By the time MC realized I was no threat, which was immediately, Mark had a big enough gap that MC couldn't reel him in. I have to say that this would be considered a moderate upset in the Smyrna Bicycles hierarchy.

A Van Garderen Away From Perfection


I have to say that Mongo's prognosticating skills are at an all-time high. Had it not been for three crashes by the "Li'l Bronze Medalist" on the penultimate stage of Paris-Nice, I was a lock for another 2 for 3 on my podium predictions...with my third guy finishing a respectable fifth.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda...but didn't! Stay tuned for my return to glory with Milan-San Remo next weekend.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Irina Shayk Vs Giant TCR Advanced SL 0

Gavia: This Too Shall Pass

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”

(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

The Beginning

The Juice Keeps Flowing


Seventeen Years In The Making

If truth be told, and it is, Mongo enjoys working on my bikes almost as much as I like riding them. The trouble is...most minor wrenching projects soon turn into all-day productions. Thus was the case last Thursday.

Towards the end of last year, Mongo turned one of my bikes (LPE...for those who know) into a trainer only ride. On this bike is a Manitou 4 fork from 1994 with elastomer suspension. I have owned this fork from new and have changed the elastomers a couple of times, but I have never given it a full breakdown cleaning...and now I know why.

Thursday was a nice day and I was planning on riding but I made the mistake of pushing down on the fork while I was in the garage. The squishy travel and slow rebound told me something was wrong. I should have just moved along and gone about my ride as planned.

Instead...I spent the next three hours taking the fork off the bike, cleaning the headset and races, and finally, breaking the fork down completely...the whole shebang...sliders, crown, elastomers...the works!

The exterior of the fork is in immaculate shape for it's age. The interior, on the other hand, was a sloppy, goopy mess. Gasoline, Clean Streak, WD-40, and lots of elbow grease...were all used in large quantities to get this baby back to "better than new" condition. I now have the firmest and smoothest 1.5 inches of travel of any trainer bike around.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Predictions Sure To Go Wrong

Omloop Het Nieuwsblad and Paris-Nice are the races that mark the beginning of Mongo actually caring about what's going on in Pro cycling...OHN for it's "Classic" feel, and P-N because it's the first "legit" stage race of the season. Paris-Nice is a tough one to call because the field is so stacked...but here we go anyway.

1...Levi Leipheimer
2...Alejandro Valverde
3...Tejay Van Garderen